Love Addiction “The Love Trap”

The Love Trap offers the opportunity vicariously to experience what love addiction is really like.

Seeing through the eyes of a self-confessed love addict will give you the chance to identify your own cycle of love addictive relating. Group therapy thrives and succeeds on vicarious experience and this book can offer something very similar – an important first step towards therapeutic recovery from what is a most destructive addiction.

The book shows too how important confused, unspoken messages from family and the past can be in influencing your behaviour and how terribly difficult it can be to carry this burden. With dedicated commitment to recovery, The Love Trap will enable self-discovery and offer insight and help if you are experiencing difficulties with your relationships.

Through her personal story, Annie Bennett will show you how to start making your own healthy choices and how to protect yourself against walking into yet another ‘set up’ for failure. You don’t have to keep repeating your past mistakes.

Love, Love, Love … Why are we so obsessed with it ?

The simple answer is that love keeps us alive, love enhances our life and ensures the future of our species. It is a vital part of evolution for human beings.
Love is so often the reason behind much of the music we hear, the poetry we read and the art we admire.

Healthy love will nurture the soul and enhance life experience. Receiving healthy love adds value to life, it can be challenging at times and supports emotional growth and joined together forges an uplifting energy. Healthy love will offer security and stability in order to develop family life.

What is it that changes love from a healthy drive toward the future and a love that is dysfunctional, devastating and leads to love addiction?

LOVE ADDICTION: the destruction and pain.

Love deprivation at a crucial early period of development in childhood, usually up to age seven or so, can leave behind physical and emotional scars that may take a lifetime to heal. In some cases the healing is never given a chance and life doesn’t ever truly feel as if it is enough or has sufficient impact. A child will develop coping skills to adapt to their life experience and environment after age seven; mostly they are successful at temporarily managing the pain of loss and love deprivation. Depression in one form or another may result from the distraction and blocking off from the real issue. A low level mood may follow; a constant reminder that life is just not fulfilling, something is missing and yet the answer seems a million miles away from consciousness.

If difficulties in early life have meant that for one reason or another a significant relationship has not been available or passed you by; anxiety, stress or panic may develop. Anxiety presents itself as a physical sign that something is out of balance. It is usually breathing patterns that begin to accelerate and change when anxiety, stress or panic occur. Fear may lie behind the anxiety; fear that receiving love and attention will never happen or be given freely. Fear will grow the more intense the pain of rejection and abandonment is interpreted or experienced. These intense emotions are likely to underpin such addictions as love addiction and sex addiction.

The drive beneath the surface is to satisfy the loss of attention and healthy love and overcome the emptiness and emotional pain from the original love experience. Ironically the quest is to find real love that will not disappoint or reject. Ultimately a subconscious “set up” heads full speed into destructive relationships that repeat the familiar patterns of old, rejection, abandonment or avoidance. Love addiction can be experienced within one relationship, significant relationships or multiple love relationships. Attempts to satisfy emotional comfort and stop stress and anxiety, love-addicted roles replay themselves again and again and love addiction begins to take a hold tightening its grip. It is not uncommon for a love addict to be sexual in order to gain comfort and feel accepted perhaps, mistaking sex for love. Love addiction is a self-defeating pattern of harmful thinking and behaviours that blocks the pathway to successful relationships and a fulfilling life experience.